We currently have a 4 week old little boy.
I am currently 29 weeks pregnant.
It is currently 104 degrees outside as I write this.
My 4 year old is currently screaming outside in the backyard.
My house currently looks like we had a tornado come through.
And, I currently have no food in the house to feed my family dinner tonight.
(Not out of need for money, but because it is too blasted hot to go to the store, and it is too difficult with Dre and Jackson.)
READER: Sarah, where are you going with this? I feel like you are stating random facts about your life, but I also know, because I am brilliant, that you are trying to do something with these facts. Please get to the point.
You are correct Reader.
I am trying to make you feel bad for me.
I am also trying to lay the foundation for what I am about to tell you.
1 1/2 weeks ago, I was ready to give up on fostering.
I was exhausted and overwhelmed.
I didn't think I could do it anymore.
So, I started to think about what it would take to place him with another family.
I was ready to hand this precious boy off to someone else out of desperation. .
In my third trimester with Jackson, I was put on bed rest.
I started to fear that this would happen again and started making up excuses in my head as to why it was a bad idea to keep him.
I was struggling with a lot of "what if's," and I was not bringing it to God.
READER: Ok, we get it. You are a crappy Christian. Let's get to the God talking to you part...
Easy Reader! Chill a little.
To the point.
Last Saturday morning, my sexy husband and I were at Another Broken Egg with our son Jackson and foster baby Dre.
We bowed our heads before eating and I prayed, "Dear God. Please make it clear to us what we are supposed to do in regards to Dre. Please make it super obvious to us, and help us not to be selfish."
(I also prayed for God to bless the food to our bodies, but based on the fact that we had waffles and french toast, I knew it was a long shot, even though God can do anything.)
Right when we said amen the manager of the restaurant walked up to us and asked Jackson if he liked his little brother. Jackson immediately said no, and I explained that he was a foster baby.
This was her response: "I was a foster baby! I was in the system for a year until I was legally adopted with 4 of my siblings. I don't know where I would be if it wasn't for them. I was born in Gary Indiana, and was in a really bad situation. What you guys are doing is amazing for this little boy. Foster care and adoption changed my life. Keep doing what you are doing. It is amazing!"
And then she walked off.
John looked up to the ceiling and just said, "Ok! Thanks God!" and we just started laughing.
It wasn't even more than five seconds after we said our prayer that God sent that woman over to our table to make it extremely clear to us what we were supposed to do.
We then called her back over to our table and explained to her all that had just happened.
We were able to share about our desire to serve God but our hesitation in doing it at this point, and how God had used her to make it clear to us that we were supposed to keep him for as long as possible.
She got a huge smile on her face and said she was so glad to be a part of it and told us that she had chills.
We now have a complete peace about keeping Dre for as long as God has planned for us.
The second that happened, there was no more questioning what we should do.
We prayed for God to make it clear to us, and within seconds He did.
So, I want to encourage you to do something.
If you are considering adoption or foster care, pray about it.
If you are scared to jump into it, pray about it.
If you are worried about the logistics, pray about it.
If you are not wanting to do it for selfish reasons, pray about it.
God will make it clear to you and your family if you are supposed to pursue it or not.
We are blessed by this precious boy, and I am so grateful to God that he made it extremely clear to us that Dre is meant to be a part of our family for as long as possible.