We started submitting our home study for legal risk adoption children back in mid January.
A legal risk adoption is a child who's parental rights are about to be terminated, and so far, there is no family who has stepped forward to take this child. The court has ordered that a broadcast of this child be sent to all agencies in Texas.
This means that you have a better chance of adopting this child in the future.
Less chance of heart ache, but still a possibility that they could go back.
We have submitted for 5 different children.
Our case worker, through Refuge House (our fostering agency), sends us an email with a picture and some info about the child.
We have a little bit of time to decide if that child would be a good fit for our family.
(Just typing that makes me LOL because it's not like some paperwork and a picture can let you know that.)
Anyways, once we decide if that child would be a "good fit" for our family, (aka age and gender) we submit our home study to the caseworker in charge.
We will probably be about 1 in 100-150 home studies submitted for each child.
It is a LONG shot.
(But after watching sweet baby Dre leave our friends the Zunigas, after being with them for almost two years, we decided we wanted to go for the long shot.)
We have submitted for two girls and three boys.
They are all precious.
We found out for sure, this week, that we will not be getting one of them.
(Realizing this week that she would not be a part of our lives, is a blog post all its own...)
We are still waiting on the other four.
I am so tired of waiting.
Every single time I get a text message or my phone rings, I grab for my phone just hoping that it will be my case worker with some news.
I have basically stalked her via text message.
I'm pretty sure she is completely over hearing from me.
"Oh hey. It's me again...Still no news??"
"Seriously! How have we not heard anything yet?!"
See, these babies have become my children.
In my mind, they are all ours.
(We will only actually take one)
I can tell you exactly what they look like, what they are wearing in their pictures, how much they weigh, what there parents are struggling with, what month they were born, how many siblings the have..
I can tell you everything about them.
They are my babies, and until they aren't my babies, and we find out that someone else is getting them, I will keep waiting.
I will rush to my phone when it buzzes or rings.
I will obsessively check my email every five minutes.
I will go to the photos section in my phone and look at their pictures over and over again.
I will keep doing this until we hear that they are or aren't ours.
Because they need someone to care, and I care because I might be their mom.
This seems different from just foster care because, while there is still a chance that they could go to a family member or a parent, it is a lesser chance.
And while it breaks my heart that a family would be forever broken, our family might be getting a new brother or sister, a new son or daughter.
Thats a big deal!
That deserves a gender reveal party all its own!
So, i'll keep waiting and hopefully soon, I will have a beautiful face that I can share on social media with a big ol sticker covering his or her face, because once this process is complete, there will be an even longer process to follow.